The power of friendship - Karl Faase interviews Sheridan Voysey live

Who can you call at 2:00 am when everything has gone wrong?  I was observing Karl Faase from Olive Tree Media interviewing Sheridan Voysey about "The Power of Friendship".

A remarkably interesting conversation and far too short! However, from watching this interview, it is challenging to reflect on:

• busyness.
• valuing my friendships.
• being intentional about growing and deepening my friendships.
• Who are the people who find it hardest to build friendships?
• Friendships include boundaries and respect.
• Social media and how this has changed our relational interactions.
• Having healthy conversations that build our friendships. Healthy conversations also include the difficult discussions that occur.
• Have we lost the ability to handle conflict?

I encourage you to watch the interview and make your own observations.

For more information: www.friendshiplab.org   

Birthdays

How do you feel about birthdays?

It's an interesting topic to observe.  Throughout much of my life, I have worked on my birthday, either in a paid role or a not-for-profit role.  It's been rare that I have been 'off work' on my birthday.  

Last year was an exception and one I really enjoyed. My birthday (the actual day) was day one of a trip to Cape York, traveling along with friends as we explored the remote stretches of Far North Queensland! I had requested and been granted leave for this trip.

However, in all my years of work, both paid and unpaid, I have never taken the day off, just because it is my birthday.  Through the years, I have observed that many people call in 'sick' or just don't turn up to work, because they are celebrating their birthday. Some I have spoken with say, it's their right.  Now, I understand that for some people, their birthday is highly valued, but what they may fail to understand, is that not coming to fulfill your employment contract, simply because you want to celebrate, puts strain on the employer and your fellow co-workers.

So how might you celebrate your special day of birth and still be considerate of others?

• communicate with your employer. If you want the day off work, negotiate the time through annual leave or a rostered day off.
• negotiate time off during the day if you are having lunch with family or friends.
• plan time to celebrate after work with family and/or friends.

What I have written may cause some readers to 'get their backs up'!

Just not turning up to work, creates concern and potential resentment.  Birthdays are important, however, so are fulfilling your commitments to your workplace (whether paid or voluntary) and clients.

Philippians 2:3-4 says, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others." (NIV)

Celebrating our birthday by serving others - now that is something to think about.

How are you tracking in 2023?

At the beginning of a new year, many people make resolutions.  The reasons to make a resolution/s vary from changing careers to losing weight or becoming healthier.

Interestingly, reading the article from finder.com.au   I noted that having or increasing their families isn't a resolution.  Buying a home is not in the top five activities. However, eating more healthily and saving more money are at the top of the list.

So how are you tracking in 2023?

Our resolutions often are made to improve our physical or financial needs.  But what about our spiritual needs? 

'It takes wisdom to build a house and understanding to set it on a firm foundation; It takes knowledge to furnish its rooms with fine furniture and beautiful draperies. It’s better to be wise than strong; intelligence outranks muscle any day. Strategic planning is the key to warfare; to win, you need a lot of good counsel.' Proverbs 24:3-5 (The Message)

Proverbs 21:2 says, 'A person may think their own ways are right, but the Lord weighs the heart.'

we need:

• The Lord in our lives.  That is a personal relationship with our Saviour, Jesus Christ. Find out more here.
• Wisdom - we find this by reading and obeying Scripture.
• Allowing the Lord to direct us by the Holy Spirit.
• Living out our faith each day (not just the day you go to meet with fellow believers).

So often, we make resolutions to change something about ourselves or our situations. However, change starts within our hearts and minds, and flows out in our actions.

Do you want to change a habit? There needs to be an action, not just a thought.  To make a change, real change in our lives means being consistent and practicing. Becoming consistent and practicing can be uncomfortable, even challenging. 

Determine to make small, specific steps that build from nothing to something.  For example, you may want to read the whole Bible in one year, yet reading the long lists of names and laws becomes tedious.  You may choose to download an App and action a reading plan that has audio as well as a short devotional which takes 5-10 mins whilst you are having morning coffee to begin your day.

You may like to increase your savings so create a savings tracker, and an account where each week a small amount of money is deposited.  Being able to start an i-saver account in your online banking is so easy in today's world.  This is just one example for you to kick-start ideas.

As you reflect on where you began in January 2023 to now, make some notes and observations on your journey.  How will you adjust what you are doing to reach the resolution?

How are you tracking in your life, in your goals, and in your faith in 2023?

Singing and Shouting

Looking through the Psalms, I've noticed numerous times when we're instructed to sing or shout to the Lord.

Psalm 96:1-2 (NIV) tells us, "Sing to the Lord a new song; sing to the Lord, all the earth. Sing to the Lord, praise his name, proclaim his salvation day after day."

Again, Psalm 98:1 (NIV) says, "Sing to the Lord a new song, for he has done marvelous things;"

Some so many talented artists write and record worship songs to tell of what the Lord is doing - marvelous things! There is no reason to not worship the Lord Jesus. We have no reason to grumble that we don't know what to sing!  If you cannot find a song to sing, then I encourage you to begin reading the Psalms.  Are you struggling to pray?  Read the Psalms aloud to the Lord as your prayer.

Out in the countryside by yourself?  Maybe shout out a Psalm to the Lord.  That will get the attention of the local animals 😉 However, you decide to pray - 'singing and shouting' are some ways to express worship.  David, who wrote many of the psalms sang and praised the Lord and wrote down his pieces.  He was a musical and poetical artist. Even today, we are the recipients of these recorded compilations.

After reading some Psalms, you could write a praise piece to the Lord to express your love for him.

Spending time in Scripture and reading (I suggest aloud) some Psalms, helps to reduce anxiety and worry.  Instead of focusing on ourselves, we focus on the One who loves us.

During trials and unexpected life happenings, we can find peace and joy through reading Scripture.  As you read the Psalms, you will find that those who wrote these words also had struggles, and they tell of deep pain, real love, and overcoming.

Something to think about.

Appreciate The Little Things

How often do you take the time to appreciate the little things in life?

If you woke up this morning, had you coffee or tea, spoke with those with you do life, then appreciate these small, but important events.

Often, we are so busy doing life, we forget that we are human ‘beings’. We long to ‘be’ – loving, living, enjoying, appreciating. However, life happens, and too often, all we do is go-through-the-motions of existing.

If you didn’t do some things, what catastrophe would occur? If you didn’t wash for one day, or didn’t check your email 20 times a day but shut the system for a day to spend with others, or rake time for yourself? These are questions I ask myself. With social media, taking on N-F-P roles, and daily tasks around the home, it’s easy to be 24/7 connected and have information overload.

Today, what action can you take to ‘be’ instead of ‘doing’?

Something to reflect on.

How do we communicate effectively?

How important is communication? The dictionary defines communication as “a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior”, “a verbal or written message”, and “a technique for expressing ideas effectively”.

Communication is an essential skill, not only in your personal and community relationships but also in your workplace.  Do you stop and truly listen to those around you?  If you remain quiet and listen to what your colleagues and work friends talk about, it may surprise you that communication, or lack of it, is often referred to.

How can communication in the workplace improve?  If you are an employer, director, manager, supervisor, or team leader, make time in your diary to ensure you meet with your staff/team.  Don’t talk down to them, ask them questions about how they view the company/business/organization, ask them how they view communication between the different areas of the business.  You may choose to do this individually, in small teams, or as a whole group.  Note, however, that some people will not engage if they feel threatened.  If people in your organization are not engaging in the conversation, it may take some time to build a relationship where they feel they can speak without fear of losing their job.

We do not know what all our team members are going through outside of the workplace, sometimes managers and supervisors are unaware of what’s happening in the workplace. You need to be listening, aware, and taking note of your team and how they interact with you and each other.

The skill of communication doesn’t just apply to the workplace.  It applies to all areas of our life – family, friends, marriage, relationships, social interactions.  The ability to communicate well, not just hear noise, but listen with intention, and engage in meaningful conversation assists you in understanding your partner, children, and colleagues much better.

How do we communicate effectively?  Listen – don’t just hear what you want to hear, don’t just hear the ‘noise’ people make; really listen to what is being said. Lead by example – if you want to improve communication, then show how; read about how to improve and practice by action. Learn – accept criticism and correction. 

Be Intentional

What comes to mind when you hear the word ‘intentional’? 

Do you think, being purposeful, or taking a deliberate action that lines up with your beliefs, and values?

Many people have heard or read the verse from Proverbs 16:3, which states, “Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”

One passage that has been important to me is from Philippians 4:6-7, which states, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

If we are not intentional then we simply flounder, make sub-standard decisions that cause distress to those around us, and make a mark against our character.

Being intentional, as stated in the dictionary, says “done with intention or on purpose”.

So, what does this mean for you and me? Are we intentional? Does what we do matter?  I believe that being intentional is important.  We should be intentional in our faith, friendships, relationships, workplaces, and aspects such as communication, kindness, work ethic, and mental and physical health.

Each moment being positively intentional adds up to create an affirmative outcome.  Do you commit your time wisely in undertaking your work, whether paid or voluntary, to achieve a productive outcome that benefits the business or organization? Do you use and plan well with available resources (staff, volunteers, products, equipment) to achieve the best result possible?

If we seek to be intentional, then first commit to becoming:

·        Wise in our planning,

·        Communicate with clarity and encouragement,

·        Meet deadlines and reporting timelines,

·        Be accountable,

·        Be kind.

Decluttering - more than just cleaning out a space

When some people hear the word 'Declutter', they inwardly groan, roll their eyes, or make excuses.

For years, I held onto 'stuff'. There was no real reason except, that in the back of my mind, I reasoned it might be needed one day and we had worked hard to obtain it.

Then in 2020, the world turned upside down. We began going through the stored boxes in the shed. Opening some of the boxes revealed items that had been packed from moving back in 2007! 

During the Christmas holidays at the end of 2020, I began the process of 'decluttering' the house.

Beginning wasn't easy. I read articles, watched shows, and started small.

After winter and then after again Christmas, I always felt overwhelmed by so much stuff around the house. Everyday cleaning seemed to be moving items around but never decreasing the volume of things.

We had talked about installing furniture to display our treasured pieces. So beginning with the bookcase, then progressing to wardrobes, kitchen cupboards, excess and old clothing, toys, DVD's, and items, we slowly began decluttering. 

Now in 2023, the house is easy to clean and maintain. I have time to appreciate my home. 

With the children now grown and living their own adventures, the house is much quieter. Having our space decluttered and simple allows us to enjoy time with friends, and not be overwhelmed, or stressed by piles of items. 

One of our pastors shared a quote in our weekly newsletter some time ago and this challenged me to think about what items I was holding onto and why. The quote: "Hold loosely to the things of this life, so that if God requires them of you, it will be easy to let them go."

Decluttering, I found, wasn't just throwing everything out. Going through the process, helped me appreciate what I have, what we need, enjoy and use. Giving items away to others, charity, etc meant what we no longer needed was repurposed by others. 

Instead of hours and hours of cleaning each week, the house can be tidy in a short time.  

Yes, there's still the 'deeper' cleans to be undertaken, such as windows, walls, etc. But the general, day-to-day cleaning takes a short amount if time, allowing me to undertake other roles and projects.

If you are considering decluttering, be mindful about why you want 

to do this. Consider seriously what you need, what can be repurposed, donated or sold.

Be realistic and most of all, be kind to yourself in the process. 

A New Year - Are You Ready for Change?

 Reflecting on the year we have journeyed through has been one of challenges and change.

Change occurs, even when we do all we can to ensure that we continue our path in comfort and routine.  Sometimes, the pathway is rocky with pebbles we slip on or stones on which we stub our toe; there may be a large rock that requires help to push out of the way.

As we journey together on life's path, let's help one another by sweeping off, picking up, and removing the stones that people slip on or stub their toes on.  We must learn to ask for help when the large rocks cannot be removed by our strength alone.

What are a few practical ideas we can undertake to prepare for the new year?

• Declutter your office.  Don't be afraid to work through the paperwork and items in your office and make some tough decisions about what is really needed or what should be relocated to another area of your house.
• Plan and set up your daily/weekly/monthly planner. (I use a color-coded system to assist with key deadlines that must be met).
• digitalize documents that you wish to keep but do not require a paper copy and add them to a specifically named folder.
• Declutter your digital devices. Do you really need 10 photos of one moment, or would 1-2 copies be enough?

Change and challenge will occur in the new year coming.  Let's pray and seek the Lord's direction and help.  Let us be prepared to step out into a "new thing"!

Planning, Listing, Learning!

Those who know me, they will understand that I am usually organized. I have lists everywhere, a planner colored for the month ahead, a diary (digital and/or paper) reflecting what's coming up, where I need to be, what needs to be purchased and bills to be paid.

It's Important to Plan

With the busyness of life in our modern society, it is important to plan - at least have some idea of what's coming up, what bills need to be paid, and what appointments must be attended.

It's easy to say, "well, I get to that when I feel like it," and for some, I guess that works. 

However, having a plan of action helps to lower stress levels, and ensure we get to those important appointments and events on the right day and at the right time. Can you imagine missing your child's special day at a school event or forgetting an important medical appointment?

Planning can be simple, or, depending on your work, voluntary positions, and demands on your time, more complex.  By planning at least, the basics, you can find ways to free up portions of your time so that you can invest in family, learning, relaxing, spiritual growth, and assisting in the community.

Lists

Over the years, lists...yes boring lists...have been my go-to, the lists ticked off have provided reassurance and have sometimes been used to prove that certain jobs have been completed. More than once, producing my list has proven that time-sensitive deadlines were met.  

Just having a tick-and-flick list can ensure you accomplish what's necessary to be completed on a certain day or meet a deadline. Ticked-off lists help to visually show there has been movement on the given task and give a sense of accomplishment.  You can use a list to break down a large job into smaller blocks of work, so you are not overwhelmed.

Learning

Never stop learning! If you stop learning, you are not breathing! Learning is life-long.  Perhaps taking on a new role is daunting but gather around yourself trusted people to affirm and encourage you as you step out.

A positive environment where you are encouraged to experience innovative ideas and challenges can bring a spark that fans into a flame of creativity.  Imagine what your creativity can bring to a not-for-profit group or your workplace? You may just have the idea they need to progress into a new and exciting pathway of growth!

Planning, having a list, continuing to learn - living life to make a difference!

Canva 2022

Staying Organised In A Chaotic World

Have you noticed how easily you can be distracted by news, social media, messenging and general life?

We all have busy lives.  Often we are simply trying to get through the day - complete work deadlines, make the NFP meeting we've committed to, get a  meal on the table, ensure the children's homework is done.

One way I have found to stay organised in the chaos is to simply take 10 minutes every few days, sit down with my diary (online/paper/planner, whichever works for you) and check through the week.  

• What is coming up - meetings and events?
• What do I need to purchase - grocercies, gifts, etc?
• What bills are due - vehicle registration, electricity, mobile phone account?
• What deadlines do I need to meet for work or N-F-P committee?
• What jobs need to be completed around the house?

You may have other questions that need to be addressed and noted into your diary. That's what a diary or planner can assist you with. Helping to keep you focused and organised so that by the end of the week, you're not feeling completly overwhelmed.

What steps can you take to plan your week more effectively?

Don't forget to schedule some time for you!

Some Things Have To Change

 Life happens...change is inevitable. Change comes, whether we are ready or not. Sometimes it's in our control, usually, we have little or no say in change.

How do we cope? Do we accept change or reject it? What is the impact on our lives, our careers, and our beliefs?

There are a few points that we do know:

1. Change will come whether or not we accept it or reject it.

2. Change may impact our lives, but we can learn to be adaptable.

3.  Change may be difficult at the moment, but the doors open to new possibilities, and new career choices.

4. Change is not something anyone wants to go through; our faith and beliefs are strengthened when we draw near to the Lord instead of pulling away.

Some verses to help:

• Psalm 51:10
• Philippians 4:13
• Proverbs 18:10
• Psalm 91:2 

Change brings about growth - in our character, in ourselves, in our faith and beliefs. We may not have much say, but how we respond will show either a positive or negative stance as to who we are. 

Whilst change will occur, there are some things that we can hold onto that are not changing:

 - God never changes;

- God's Word never changes, we grow and change as we read and apply the Words of the Bible to our lives;

- We are constantly changing; even if we think we are not;

-  Like the annual cycles of the seasons, life is a constant change.  How we embrace change will either help us flourish or flounder.

What will you choose?

Be Kind. You Don't Know What Someone Else Is Going Through.

 In today's fast paced world, people can often forget that our words, tones, language and actions may either help or hurt another.

Too often, we're all about us. Getting to work, completing the workload, meeting deadlines, achieving outcomes, making a profit, proving why we should have the coveted position or be in leadership.

More often than not, there are those around us who are forgotten, used or ignored in our ever chasing, ever climbing to be on top of the pile.

To be kind does not take a lot of effort.  However, being kind may mean having to adjust our attitude, thoughts and actions.  You don't know what someone else is going through.  Your kindness may in that moment be the factor that changes their next decision.